i think i've had a break through...perhaps...but i'm not sure. today we were at the park for a playdate with a bunch of wonderful moms...i was really looking forward to the day out since we'd been home alone for days with sicknesses trying to clean the house before the inlaws arrival. anyways, it's also spring break so z has been home and no bible study, no anything. ok so moving along....we went to the park. after being there for aproximately three point two seconds when ro was throwing pricker balls...well of course some random kid walked by at the exact time and got hit in the head. now the kid did not scream or cry...just looked stunned at ronan. so i go running after ronan and he books it. so i'm running after him screaming that he needs to come back and say sorry. so i catch him and tell him he needs to say sorry. he starts bawling....i do the pleading and all that..."ronan please just say sorry..." "please say sorry or we'll have to go home"...."i'm going to call oma and opa and tell them they can't come"....i even fake called oma on my cell....but he just refused. so i dragged him to the car did some disciplinary things...still nothing. buckled him in the car seat....still nothing....finally i he calmed down and said he'd say sorry. so off we went to find the boy. as soon as we got to him i sat ronan down in front of the boy and ro started freaking out again....refusing to say sorry. i swear i was going to lose it. and all my poor friends are looking at me with that helpless look of 'hey, it's ok, he's crazy...it's not you'. :) love my friends. but i seriously wanted to strangle the child. meanwhile the boy is looking at me like i'm crazy....i introduce myself and tell him ronan's name. the boy says "i did the right thing i just walked away". of course you did kid...of course you did. finally my dear friend melissa arrived and sensing that i was seconds away from throwing ronan down the river (you know that out of your mind laugh you start having when you are bordering on a breakdown??? yea that cackle was coming forth from my lips) . well she nicely stepped in and asked if she could hold ronan for a while till he said he would say sorry. so she did...gosh i love that girl. anyways, after about ten minutes of rocking and softly talking, ronan went to say sorry to the boy. then he came running to me for a big hug. oh that boy. i love him fiercly.
so since this time i've been pondering my son...and i think i've had a breakthrough...i think ronan freaks out from the attention. granted he is stubborn as a mule...but i think he just shuts down with that many people around looking at him while i'm yelling. and of course my yelling probably isn't helping him either. but when melissa removed him from the attention and sat calmly with him until he was ready to say sorry...he responded. this happened one other time before when i wanted him to say thank you. but the more ben and i forced him to say sorry, with the people watching, the more he freaked. and he almost ALWAYS says thank you for EVERYTHING! but it was the same attention thing...so we'll see. i'm going to try this again in the future and see if i can calmly remove him and soothe him till he relinquishes. i know sometimes this won't be convenient, but well...each child needs their own parental tweaks. one thing about ronan is that he's no really ever intentionally mean to other kids. he gets along well and is sweet. the whole throwing thing was not intentional, it was accidental. he's never hit or bitten another child. he's a good kid that reserves his crappy behavior for his family....(hmm..sounds like me)
SOOO...if you're child gets accidentally pegged with a pricker ball by ronan...bear with me, it might take a while for an apology from ro...but he is only two...and we're working on it...together.
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