House Stress

In case you didn't know, we are on the house hunt. our rent in our current house runs out in september and we have prayed thru trying to find a house. they are willing to rent to us but the rent will be almost more than buying a house. so we have prayed and prayed and prayed, and so far, God has walked us thru each stage. giving ben a raise, coming up with the downpayment (you know who you are and thank you!), and then our first time out we found a house. in our price range most of the houses we are looking at are just unlivable. mold, cracked slabs, just yucky. so we'd be paying mortgage and then have to shell out tons of money to even live in the house. but this little house we found was just perfect. 3 bedroom, 2 bath (which most houses only have 1) and just 1100 square feet. which may seem small, but if i told you the price (especially you midwesterners) you'd gasp. however, it has a BIG yard, an enclosed patio (hello toy room!), and a pool (i'm still on the fence about how i feel about that one). its move in ready and has been kept up amazingly well. a little couple passed away but they kept it immaculately clean. the kitchen is crazy 70s wallpaper but it looks like it was put up yesterday! there are things in the house that we can fix up, but nothing is absolutely necessary in order to live in it. and that's huge! you have no idea! especially with three little kids. so anyways, we put an offer on it and we should hear next week if they accept or counter. i'm sure they'll counter which is fine, but i HATE not knowing. i completely trust God in this that if we don't get the house, he has something better for us. but i'm an over thinker. i've retreated into my head and i spend hours thinking about how to pack, how to decorate, what still needs to be done at our house. so i'm not suffering from stomach aches and insomnia. i feel like my stomach is in knots all the time! i can't seem to get my mind to shut off and stop. i've written things down, prayed, imagined a black screen in my mind, you name it, i've tried it. last night was absolutely horrific. i was up till 2:30 am. ben finally gave me 1 tyelenol pm and i still couldn't sleep. it took over an hour for that to work. so this morning at 6:30 when the boys came in, i was SICK! the room was spending, and i felt like i was going to absolutely puke. it was horrible. but my amazing, wonderful, thoughtful, husband told me to lay down, get some sleep, and he would take the kids to church....ALONE. oh i love that man. so i slept till 9:30 and ate a slow breakfast. now i'm watching oprah and folding clothes. ahhh...blissful. now if i could just shut my head off and make my stomach stop hurting!