once again nursing is disasterous for me. i went to the doc today and i had some of the most infected cut up nipples he'd ever seen (is this tmi for a blog?). i also had mastitis in one too. he wass literally in shock i was still even trying to nurse. i tried pumping for some relief but i barely produce anything and couldnt keep up with jade's demands. so i threw in the towel and said im done. i tried all i could but i cant handle crying thru another day. ive bawled and bawled...my family needs me and ive just not been here for them because of all the pain ive felt. and im still a good mom even if she has fomula. as for my pelvis, the doc is going to send me to an ortho but i have to wait a few more weeks because my joints are still too stretchy from pregnncy to find out what the final damage is to my pelvis. so for now its more vicodine, no stairs or uneven ground, and no extended periods of walking. good times. he did say its probably a good idea to not have any more kids. which we weren't really planning to, but its still really painful to hear. so needless to say its been a really emotional day. and here are some pics from jade's home photo shoot for her birth announcement. by the way, the dress she's wearing is the one i bought when i found out i was pregnant with zander. before i knew it was a boy of course. but i've held onto it for four years, praying for my girl. so i thought it only appropriate to have her pic in it!
5 comments:
breastfeeding or formula does not define you as a mom. You are an amazing mom and I'm soo happy God has blessed you with two beautiful boys and an amazing girl! Don't worry about what people might think about formula feeding- she will turn out just fine and will feel very loved by you and Ben!!
Ugh! I feel your pain, to some extent. You know my story of nightmares with trying to breastfeed Matthias. I can't imagine having mastitis again period, but having it that close to having given birth I can't even imagine! You surely have quite the birth and recovery stories. You could be an inspiration to all. You're a trooper! Hang in there! You're doing the best you can do and that's all that can be asked. So glad you have Ben right now.
Of COURSE you're still a good mom! And aren't you thankful that you live in a time when we have formula? She'll get just as much love, and probably lots more since you'll be so much more relaxed during feedings. Not to mention the ways the rest of the family will benefit, too. Good job, mom.
And she looks adorable. I love the story about the dress.
Your the best mom ever. Doesn't matter if you breast feed or bottle feed. You gave it a good try, and I am so proud of you!!!
Larissa! she's beautiful!! I am so sorry for you with the mastitis...i never got that, but i can relate to the struggle with breastfeeding. I had my hardest time when i had a c-section, and i always wonder if having the c had something to do with it? i don't know...and i've always given my kids both formula and breast, because i have never produced enough. don't worry about it...you are an awsome provider and mom for your babies!! congrats on Jade and for ben's job!
Post a Comment