sick house again

oh man has it been a long couple of days. i'm just so sick of feeling like poop. i'm sick of sicknesses, i'm sick of being tired, i'm just sick of not having energy. zander started with a cold that turned into a sinus infection so he's on antibiotics and his nose is still running. ronan got the same cold and ben took him to the doctor on wednesday cause his eye was oozing green snot out of it. (yes, it's as disgusting as it sounds) they said it wasn't an infection cause he didn't have a fever and sent him home. by today he was wore out, had a fever, and both eyes were oozing snot constantly! like neon green/yellow. in the morning he cries cause his eyes are glued shut and he can't see to get out of his bed. so back to the doctor tonight for the little guy and they said he has a double ear infection and a bacterial infection in his eyes. so eye drops and antibiotics for him. and then there's me. i started getting their cold and it turned into the cough from hell. i can't hold jade cause i cough and shake her awake. i can't sleep at night and now my right ear is filled and i can't hear. i want to sleep more than anything but it's just not happening cause i cough myself awake or spend most of the night trying not to cough. grrr....
i feel just broken down. i have not felt good in so long with the end of the pregnancy, my pelvis, nursing, and now being actually sick. i want so badly to be able to at least attempt to get back to normal. as it stands, i'm terrified to have ben go back to work in a week cause i have no clue how i'm going to do it all. i absolutely cannot do it alone right now. i'm just too wore out. neither one of us has had all three kids at one time yet. scary. we just tagteam and one either has jade and the other has the boys or vice versa. ben's been amazing for me. again, God knew he needed to be here for me.
we also got a surprise gift in the mail that took our breath away and made us both cry like babies. a little back story. ben's mom died when he was almost three and his dad remarried a few years later to becky - his current mom. becky's sister in law (ben's aunt) sent us a package with a card that ben read out loud to me (never do this, it makes it way sadder!). ben's mom who died, barb, was a sewer and shared that passion with his aunt karen. so when barb died, karen got some of her material including some lace from her wedding dress and an old suit. karen made into a dress for her daughters and was now passing it on to ben. what an unexpected gift! ben had no idea that this dress was even out there or that there was material that used to be his mom's! words can't express how precious this gift is to ben's heart. so thank you again karen!
alrighty, i'm off. more later!